Equal Marriage for Same Sex Couples

In the aftermath of our marriage, we realized we had an opportunity to do more advocacy work on behalf of equal marriage if we wanted to. So we spent much of 2001 writing our book Just Married in hope that it would help encourage more discussion and debate about same-sex marriage and perhaps contribute to better understanding and acceptance of diversity in our world.

We finished our first manuscript days before the Ontario marriage hearings began. With frenzied energy and help from friends, we launched this web site as an advocacy tool at the time of the hearing and our outreach has been growing ever since.

Since our marriage, the Law Commission of Canada (the Justice Minister of Canada's own legal advisors appointed by Parliament) have recommended the legalization of same-sex marriage. So has the Canadian Human Rights Commission. Editors and columnists from all political spectrums have shown that the vast majority of the media agree.

So what will the three justices decide in this case? We can only share with you thoughts that we've picked up in the past month or t Joe Varnell and Kevin Bourassa. (Photo courtesy of Carolyn Swadron)

Joe Varnell and Kevin Bourassa. (Photo courtesy of Carolyn Swadron)

wo as we spoke with a variety of people including: friends and neighbors in back yard barbeques (right), legal experts and human rights activists from around the world in Turin, and reporters from the past couple of dozen interviews in Montreal, Ottawa, Toronto, and Vancouver. Most people think we're going to win. Even an evangelical Christian television talk show host told us he thought so. Ontario courts, worldwide, are seen as progressive, and have already demonstrated they will defend citizens from discrimination based on sexual orientation.

Link to Elliott & Kim - our heroes fighting for our right to marriage in Ontario

This journey began for us because MCC Toronto had the courage and vision to mount this challenge. Our effectiveness is directly linked to the tremendous strength we found in Rev. Dr. Brent Hawkes, the board of directors, and the congregration. Many unions, publications, Canadian and International groups, and various faith communities have joined us in our effort. Thank you for your support!

The commitment and strength shown by MCC Toronto was equaled by the incredible efforts of the legal teams who gave voices to our hearts and minds. Countless hours of donated time, many sleepless nights and an overwhelming sense of teamwork have made tomorrow possible. It is a privilege to be associated with them in serving humanity. Please consider helping pay for legal expenses.

Lastly, to the couples here in Ontario and across the country who are holding their breath with us tonight, we have to express our gratitude for your laughter, your efforts, your support and your love. Together we are making a difference and touching so many people's lives.

The Decision! (PDF)

The 130 page Joe Varnell (left) and Kevin Bourassa being married by Rev. Brent Hawkes, MCC Toronto, January 14, 2021 (Photo courtesy of MCC Toronto)

document was available at the appointed hour and there were a few seconds of scrambling for copies , followed by a racket of anxious page flipping as we all collectively held our breath. Soon however, Douglas Elliott, his hands shaking with emotion looked at us and beamed, "We won".

There were tears, hugs and as the lights of the media closed in, I fell into the arms of the man who now was legally recognized as my husband and cried!

After the first few moments of elation, we looked at the document and flipped through, seeing what remedy the courts had decided upon.

The courts have declared that any restrictions on same sex marriage are unconstitutional and that the legislatures of both the Province of Ontario and the federal government have up to 24 months to fix the problem. Any solution that is devised by the government MUST afford gay and lesbian couples the same rights and freedoms that heterosexual couples enjoy. No seperate, but equal regimes! No second class status.

As our smiles grew broader, we kept reading and with hearts melting and tears in our eyes, we saw in print the words that we had dreamt of hearing from our judiciary so many months ago:

I declare that the marriages of Kevin Bourassa and Joe Varnell and of Elaine Vautour and Anne Vautour are valid legal marriages. I order that the Registrar Genral is required to accept registration of the documents evidencing these two marriages.

Ontario Government Won't Appeal

According to Canadian Press, when asked to comment on Friday's Ontario Superior Court decision, he indicated that he agreed with the court's ruling and that it was now up to the federal government to respond proactively.

Quebec, another powerhouse province, has also indicated it is looking for Ottawa to show leadership in passing inclusive and fair legislation. The Quebec Assembly unanimously voted to repeal the "one man and one woman" clause from a provinical statute defining of marriage last month, sending a strong message to the federal government.

Cauchon indicated there are alternative solutions to marriage - a sign he still does not understand the ruling:

"If we decide to do something, there's many ways. I mean, look at what has been done in many countries in the world. The province of Quebec is a good example, and other countries as well."

But there are only two ways. Abolish marriage for all, or open marriage to all couples. Registered domestic partnerships are marriage apartheid if offered only as an alternative to marriage, rather than an option from which marriage is also a choice.

Manitoba Joins Ontario and Quebec

Ready To End Marriage Discrimination

Manitoba became the third province after Quebec and Ontario to indicate to Ottawa that marriage discrimination should end and they would accept same-sex marriages. Today's Winnipeg Sun reports that Manitoba Justice Minister Gord Mackintosh is personally in favour of making same-sex unions legal.

"I would support that there be available for same-sex couples a legal recognition of their union," Mackintosh said, adding that his mind was "open" to "whether that is a marriage".

We call on other provinces to do the same, and tell Ottawa to accept the Ontario decision and end discrimination against the families of gays and lesbians.

Manitoba introduced legislation yesterday to extend property rights to common-law partners (as we reported earlier). The province made the move because experts told them they were out of line with the Charter (just as Ottawa so blatantly is again, in our marriage case). Manitoba understood and accepted change. The Chretien federal Liberals (sad, but that's what they still brand themselves) understand. The cabinet ministers understand. Some claim to be our supporters. But the silence continues. Back-room work, they say. In a third elected term with a majority of seats in Parliament and no effective opposition? Shame!

"Since the adoption of the Canadian Charter and its entrenchment in the Constitution, the drafters of the Constitution have entrusted the courts with a greater role with respect to assessing the constitutionality of laws and government actions...this ability of the courts to declare laws unconstitutional is at the origin of the argument that judges have too much power. Personally, I disagree
-Martin Cauchon, April 18, 2002. speaking to the Association for Canadian Studies on the 20th Anniversary of the Charter

Is there a Liberal in Ottawa with leadership aspirations, who is not afraid of a bully? When do you take a public stand?

"The writing is on the wall for this issue"

Liberal pollster: Canada accepts same-sex marriage

"Writing on the wall" Government Pollster says Canadians are ready for same-sex marriage. We await Ottawa's response due on July 29, 2021

A July 22 headline in the Ottawa Citizen said the federal government had no plans to appeal the Ontario court ruling in favour of same-sex marriage. The government still opposes same-sex marriage, the paper said, but Ottawa hopes to streamline the legal process towards resolution. Suggestions that Ottawa wouldn't appeal the Ontario case touched off a round of speculation on motives and strategy. Sources involved in the Ontario marriage case have been assured by the Justice department that the Ottawa Citizen headline was not accurate. All options are still being considered (so keep those calls and letters flowing!). Others agree, saying that it is more likely that Ottawa will appeal the Ontario decision in order to buy themselves more time to consider options.

But what options are there? The court was clear. Government has to let gays and lesbians marry or Ottawa has to get out of the marriage business. A pending decision in Quebec is widely expected to reaffirm the decision of the Ontario court.

But like the Berlin Wall, Ottawa could simply recognize the new order and end marriage apartheid without a lengthy legal battle that uses too many resources best placed elsewhere.

Today the federal Liberal government's own party pollster released data that said Ottawa would be supported by Canadians if it stopped this war against gay and lesbian families and treated every family with fairness and equality.

"The writing is on the wall for this issue," Michael Marzolini, chairmain of Pollara (the Liberal party's pollster) told the National Post on July 25. "It will become more popular. It will become more and more acceptable."

"Clearly the mood is changing," Marzolini said. "The new generation of Canadians are far more supportive of gay and lesbian marriage than the previous generation. These numbers will increase just as a result of demographics."

The issue of equal marriage has been in the media every day since the July 12, 2021 Ontario court decision, with opinion makers from across the country forming a growing consensus that the government's discrimination against us must end (see sample of media links below). A similar process of discussion and education took place in the Netherlands, prior to ending marriage discrimination in that country in April 2001.

Marriage advocate Kees Waaldijk says that when marriage is being discussed in the regional and community media outlets (as it is in Canada), we can be confident that a broad educational process is underway - one that can only result in greater understanding and acceptance. Only 40% of Canadians in rural areas support the Ontario ruling for same-sex marriage. More work is required in these areas to educated and inform the public. The discussions now underway in local media will certainly help lift those numbers in future surveys. You can't take away knowledge once it is acquired. The world is not flat and the sky will not fall.

Ottawa will hold a press conference late Monday, July 29 (after the Pope has left Canada?) to announce its intentions. We remain hopeful that the Prime Minister and our government will accept the overwhelming consensus and walk the talk of inclusiveness and courageous leadership. Jean Chretien worked under Pierre Elliott Trudeau, our great Prime Minister who decriminalized homosexuality and gave us our Charter of Rights and Freedoms. How appropriate if Mr. Chretien could end his third term with an accomplishment in human rights, based on our Charter, that would resonate the world over for years to come.

Please ensure our leaders hear your voice. Please speak out for justice and equality and let our leaders know you believe all families should be treated equally. Equal marriage for same-sex couples. It's only fair in a just society.

Ottawa Appeals Equal Marriage ruling in Ontario

The Federal Justice Minister, Martin Cauchon, issued a press release to confirm his government would appeal the recent Ontario Superior

Court ruling that said to deny gays and lesbians the right to full marriage is unconstitutional. The minister cancelled a press conference that his department had scheduled but in a media release, he said that inspite of his government's commitment to full equality and the value of recognizing all committed relationships "there are important reasons why we as a society must consider carefully the issues around changing the fundamental nature of marriage and what the implications of such a change might be."

Speculation continues, that the minister is simply playing for time and that he has no real plan to push forward with the three marriage challenges in British Columbia, Quebec and Ontario. He is simply considering how to solve the issue of same-sex marriage in Canada, within the two years allotted to him by the Ontario court ruling. To the applicant couples, however, there is no acceptable solution except one: full equal marriage. "How would the minister feel if there was a policy that only anglophones could be ministers?" asked Martha McCarthy. Others were more direct, pointing out that any solution which does not include full marriage is tantamount to resurecting the ghosts of segregation and separation that have historically been used to give oppression the smack of respectability. They are the crutches that allow self-proclaimed broad-minded people to go to sleep at night, safe in the knowledge that the label of bigot cannot be thrown at them while keeping gays and lesbians out of the 'heterosexuals only' country-club that is marriage. As Joe Varnell put it, to give us a 'separate, but equal' system of relationship recognition would be to return us to the days, "when you sewed pink triangles on us."

Liberal Dose Of Disappointment

The Betrayal Of Canadian Values

An Open Letter to The Liberal Party - Government of Canada

Wherever Cauchon is this week, he isn't alone. Several prominent Liberals have been curiously absent from this watershed debate. Where is Sheila Copps, who has bravely defended gay rights in the past? Where is Allan Rock, whose claim to represent his party's socially progressive wing is fading faster than his leadership prospects? Why are leading Quebec ministers such as the usually equable Cauchon, Denis Coderre, who is ultraliberal on immigration, or the urbane Pierre Pettigrew, so conspicuously out of step with progressive Quebec opinion on this issue? Where are those individual Liberal MPs who are frequently fierce champions of civil rights in other countries ... where is Paul Martin, who has taken on tampering with the status quo as his summer job? His silence is loudest of all.
The Ottawa Citizen, July 31, 2021

So more court rulings may be useful to bolster the case for formal government sanction of gay unions. But it shouldn't be an excuse for Parliament to avoid correcting its past mistakes, which is what the vacillating, chicken-hearted ministers of the Liberal government are doing ... It's sad that there isn't more leadership where it matters most, in the office of the prime minister. One would expect more from a disciple of Pierre Elliott Trudeau, who understood that civil rights are not matters of political advantage. One would expect more from Jean Chretien, who was Mr. Trudeau's justice minister when the Charter of Rights came into being.
The Vancouver Sun, July 31, 2021

It was a sad day for Canada's standing as a champion of human rights and social justice when Minister Cauchon announced yesterday that the Government would appeal the "marriage" ruling of the Ontario Court of Justice. It was sad for two reasons.

First, this ruling is careful and specific, and makes clear that the prohibition against same-sex couples marrying cannot be reconciled with the values enshrined in the Charter of Rights and Freedoms. All three justices made clear and compelling arguments that should not require greater clarification from some other court. It is obvious Minister Cauchon's decision was based, not on fairness and a desire for clarity, but in order to allow this government to try and find some other avenue to continue to discriminate against gay and lesbian Canadians, who want nothing more than the simple dignity of full and effective recognition of their families and of their standing as Canadian citizens. The ruling makes clear that the Federal Government needs to address this disparity between charter rights and values and the current prohibition against same-sex couples marrying. What further clarity is needed?

This is such a self-serving mistatement of the facts. The Government of Canada has not taken its responsibility, but has only acted when the courts have forced its hand, reminding them as they have done over and over that they are the protectors of the rights of all Canadians. The changes the Minister mentions occurred, not because this government has taken its responsibilities seriously, but because it had no other choice.

Fundamental human dignity, and the principles of social justice which we all should support, have been mistreated again. A government incapable of providing full dignity and justice for all its citizens is a government unfit for the name. While each of you spend your summer reflecting on the controversies swirling around your party, perhaps you will take a moment to reflect on something that should not be controversial in a free and democratic society --- that all citizens are of equal worth and value. And then ask yourself --- does your government's position on the issue of marriage for same sex couples not reflect a deep intolerance to this basic premise of equal worth and value.

July 11, 2002 - Day Before Decision

The Decision! (PDF)

Answers About the Ontario Decision